you have gone on.

quite honestly and less vaguely
i am at arms length
to hindsight and emotional reckoning
trying to understand
where we found ourselves lost from
our happiest explorations

left behind the candid dispersal
long nights
filled with dreams and idiosyncrasies
late night petaled lips
and carefully rewarding phone calls

i just want to know you're all right.

but time kills all joy
stews in the obsolete
craves what once was

i was a murder to your crow
a wave in the ocean of your denial
unfinished business
unresolved factions

rebound from books pulled at the seams
trivial pursuant
pretending that this was much less serious
than what you led on

we didn't define things
let our hands do the talking
and our eyes averted
always staring down some other prize

carefree and careless
easy going down the rabbit hole
never to return
to the state of understatement and coarse levees

you could have been a queen
raised up glasses
and made up beds

slept it all away

gave it all way

in the silence and disappearances

pushed it all away

in all honesty
bloodshed and broken promises
this is what you do, you said

there is only so much leeway you can give yourself
to surrender to the same vices and anxieties
repeat cyclist
inevitable scrutiny

we've seen our rooms
dirty and whole
with no apologies
just explanations

and yet, after all the tongue ties
the court dates
the exasperated hours

you still walked away from all of this
with no apologies
no explanations

just brick & mortar.

haunt

and then i fell asleep to your voice in the distance,
quivering away, reminding, of what you used to be..

in love and inspired,
silent and subtly supportive,
making keep with the winds and timepieces.

scratching the surface, sounding like radio static, just like the ghosts we once were, here to haunt our memories.

i can hear the motorcycles across the interstates,
and the soft white noise of the city,
burning our ears like privied conversations
we were never meant to hear.

so i lay here awake,
waiting for the words
that are never sung
only accented
as harmonies and pauses
of the muses we caused.

title owned by deft vehicle tragedies

here i trail the trachea
of bourbony traced etymology
sacrilege pleasures
of a lonely widower

and you try try try
to keep your insides in
from falling out
like supple slips of pedestrian leftover language

road kill
clever nuisance dirt poor cup drips

this is the cornered cold front
unprepared impediments
and stretched out deadlines

should have just left it alone
should have left me rained in

the signs were there
the telephones heavy
stale cribbage
pompous high end fixtures

impromptu placement of inanimate objects
lesser read criteria
borrowed time and toothbrushes

if you're better off, let's fold our hands
cross our legs
clench our fists
shuffle our feet

day one in the first defense
cracking whips and taking blame
carousels and merry go roustabouts
you're a perfect maybe lean day pacifist

keep the ball solely
for the game
and the game only

you're a chess peace
and i'm the king of splashes.

you don't

deserve this

deserve me

deserve us

disservice to it all

drunk and fishing for some invisible handout

while it stood in front of you all along.

goodbye to the fuzz

hello claritas

down and dirt grieved

shoes soiled

friends passed over

due diligence and secretarial work

stay for awhile

and drink someone else's life.

pills.

we could line the walls 

with perfect paragraphs

still the exits

are best described;

manic regiments

and time continuum martyrs

in abraxas we are all in-tact

come on babe and crumble

in our canopy cascade

reading minds in my leisure lay

i could swallow pills

til im pushin daises

on a monday, monday

skirt in with your mother

coming down from the rafters

im the panic in your pageant praise

storming the pariah

meant to lead in with dis-taste

all the mockery you set aside 

come on babe and crumble

in our canopy cascade

reading minds in my leisure lay

i could swallow pills

til im pushin daises

on a monday, monday

come on see me darling

i'm a mess in a party dress

im addressed to your stark ends

i could swallow pills til

the morning after

or next. 

squints & countenances

she sleeps in til noon
devoid of harnesses of human sheathes
smokes her cigarettes
in her leisure
shuffles her fingers

muses on memories
makes new arguments
shields old harborings

she's an indie queen
former limelight tween

sold her lungs and student loans
for lives singular and wholly in betterment

life on a string, slowly threading the needlepoint
catching twinkles, exploiting stars
staying up late
shelving scars

pretty and accurate
pretty insanely practical

storming the pan-am
starlets and figures of pandemonium
cash in hand
guard down
meddle with these kids
sore and run up the tallies

dirty messed up conversations, from previous
wavering over the complexities
of linear and unhinged family ties

it doesn't have to be so much of a car crash
mending spoons
digging out the hearts
wondering whose cold you've got

holding onto fingertips
of a stranger you wish
would just leave it be
and keep sake
only stolen time
in exchange for this one last lie.

TONIGHT